Friday, November 6, 2009

You Know You Have a SCREAMER when...

Apparently these are really cool shoes. Aunt Lindsey bought them for Scout months ago...and they finally fit. I think everyone deserves a rich aunt.



My heart sunk when Naomi was born and she didn't make a peep for about 30 minutes. She was just a soft-spoken little critter.
...and then we brought her home. ...and then she grew up.

You know you have a SCREAMER when...
1. your child SCREAMS when you don't give them what they want.....or......when you do give them what they want. They just SCREAM.

2. Your child doesn't do tones. Soft, gentle, sweet, angry, mad. It's all lumped together in one big tone. SCREAMING

3. You lie in bed at night and your husband can't understand why you are not making coherent sentences. Does he not understand that I have been SCREAMED at all day. I have been verbally abused for 12 hours. Do you wanna fight?

4. You bring your child with you to teach Sunday School. One of the girls in the classroom covers her ears with her hands. She said the baby was hurting her eardrums. I just kept teaching. Was it really that loud? I have a hard time making that judgement anymore.

5. When you go places someone always says, "oh, it sounds like someone is upset."
No, actually she's not. She's just SCREAMING.

6. On a two and a half hour drive, your sister, who loves your child just short of you and your husband, has to literally pull the car off the freeway and ask someone else to drive. She said she was losing her mind and couldn't take the screaming anymore.

7. On the same car ride, your other sister-in-law asks sweetly, " doesn't she know any better?"
your other sister-in-law turns around to face her and charms the whole car with an extremely animated version of five little monkeys, and your third sister-in-law sits quietly next to the SCREAMING baby and reads a book. She says she has a screamer too. I just prayed that no one would hit her.

8. You have to leave five minutes early to go anywhere. It takes that long to get her in the car seat. After the initial SCREAMING, hitting, thrusting her back with a small to intermediate temper tantrum, I can finally overpower her in a moment of weakness and thread her arms through the harness straps. Then it will take another five minutes for her to stop SCREAMING. All in all, about ten minutes of SCREAMING each time I get in the car.

9. As you drift off to sleep at 9:30 (it's not possible to stay up any later: you need the silence that only sleep can bring)) you wonder how in the world you can possibly listen to the SCREAMING one more day. Funny enough, you are just so grateful for one more day with your little SCREAMER that it just doesn't seem so bad.

10. I have a SCREAMER. Do you have one, too?

10 comments:

The Cooks said...

Yes, yes I do.

JoshandJen said...

Oh yes, Wade is already our screamer. "Josh said boy he has a temper and he doesn't get that from me" He has started this high pitch scream whenever its something he doesn't like, or he wants something or heck when he just feels like screaming :) I hope he outgrows it..

anna said...

Yep - a screamer who throws herself down and trashes her head around until it hits something and then cries more because someone seems to have hurt her head - haha. Number 3 is my favorite!

Natalie said...

Our family could have T-shirts made "SCREAMERS R Us". Kathryn is the queen screamer and it makes me want to pull out my hair-- if you see me bald next time you'll know why.

Orme Family said...

Seriously Jess, "Doesn't she know better?" ha,ha. That was a good one...your post, not my joke. Love ya. You know that the Orme's all say you were the toughest kid in the family growing up!

Fancy Nancy said...

Oh J! She doesn't scream?!?! Sometimes with older brothers, you just do what you can to get attention and survive! She is adorable. I loved getting to see her after so long! I love her shoes, and Annie has the same pair. Only the rich Aunt didn't buy ours!!! hee hee

Sarah Hastings said...

Oh yes, although she finally grew out of it, so there may be hope yet. looks like y'all have been having fun (between screaming sessions anyway), I love Williams sign to the homeless, completely awesome.

The WALL Street Times said...

I love the shoes. But I do miss that scream. I was thinking about my Miss Naomi the other day. She has such as sweet little, innocent face that even when she makes me want to pull over and have someone else drive, I still I want to kiss her and give her a big squeeze. I love you all. William where did you get so thoughtful. I don't know if I want the homeless living at my house but if you want to by all means go ahead.
Love,
Linds

Christine Fotheringham said...

Guess not! I can relate to using all of my bodily force to get my child in the carseat, however. Little stinker.

Hey Care! said...

Jessie! You are simply awesome!!